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"If you love two people at the same time, choose the second one, because if you really loved the first one you wouldn’t have fallen for the second" - Johnny Depp
3 yrs old "Mommy, I love you."
13 yrs old "Mom, whatever!"
16 yrs old: "My mom is so annoying!"
18 yrs old "I wanna leave this house."
25 yrs old: "Mom, you were right"
30 yrs old "I want to go back to my Mom's house".
50 yrs old: "I don't want to lose my mom."
70 yrs old: "I would give up EVERYTHING for my mom to be here.....with me."
You only have 1 mom.
Like this if you appreciate
& love your mom!
Comments on your FB profile pic
friends: aww, you look so pretty! :)
best friends: Man, you lookin so s*xii! I would so tap that! XD
i look at my best friend and think: 'why the F*ck do i love this retard?!'
Missing someone isn't about how long it has been since you have seen them or the amount of time since you've talked. It's about that very moment when you're doing something and you wish that they were right there with you.
be careful who you open up to. only a few people actually care, the rest are just curious.
You may not be the brightest crayon in the box, but you're still my favorite colour.
It's not that I hate you.. it's just, put it this way. if you were on fire and i had water, i'd drink it.
I wish that I had Jessie's girl! <3
I can be mature. i just choose to be immature so i can have fun :)
That moment when your parents tell you to stay in the line when you’re shopping, and when you’re almost near the cashier, they’re not even back yet, so you start freaking out.
God made coke.
God made pepsi.
God made me.
Oh so s*xy.
God made rivers.
God made lakes.
God made you.
Well.. we all make mistakes.
Voldemort is like Hitler. Without the coolest mustache ever.
Get Sossy on the registered s*x offenders list 2011
Boy: Why are you straightening your hair?
Girl: Because straightening it makes it longer.
Girl: Yeah. Didn't you know that?
Psychiatrist: So, why did you try to put your dick into a hair straightener?
I'm a PUNK, so I must REBEL,
I'm a GRADE A STUDENT, I must be a NERD,
I wear BLACK, I must be a GOTH,
I look DEPRESSED, I must be EMO,
I'm CRYING in public, I must be AN ATTENTION SEEKER,
I'm a HUMAN BEING
I must be STEREOTYPED.
jessica o sullivan is a sl*t
So I've been chatting with this 13 year old girl online. Shes funny, flirty and s*xy. Now she tells me shes an undercover cop, how F*cking cool is that for someone her age?
What do you call a guy who makes jokes about girls being in the kitchen? Single.
R.I.P Micheala Harte :(
Friend: did you know that masturbation can lead to the loss of memory??
You: really? i didnt know
Friend: Wait........what was i talking about?
like if you get it :)
sometimes i wonder if my parents look at me and think 'oh my god, my child is a retard'
spot 'gay' : abcdefghijustinbieberklmnopqrstuvwxyz
when someone touches your phone and you automaticaly turn into a ninja.
So ready for summer.
A boyfriend is supposed to tell his girlfriend that he loves her everyday, send her random texts, call her for no other reason but to hear her voice and always makes sure she is in a good mood .. when they meet kiss her gently and hug her and hold her hand... when they are waiting for something, come behind her and hug her and dont let go<3 This is true love.. if you have a girlfriend.. make her feel special and do all this <3
Learn Chinese in 5 minutes! (say it out loud ;D )
1. Thats not right
(Sum Ting Wong)
2. See me ASAP
(Kum Hia Nao)
3. Small horse
(Tai Ni Po Ni)
4. You need a facelift
(Chin tu fat)
5. I thought you were on a diet
(Wai Yu Mun Ching)
6. He's cleaning the car
(Wa Shing Ka)
7. Your body odour is offensive
(Yu Stin Ki Pu)
8. This is a tow away zone
(No Pah King)
(Fa Kin Su Pah)
"Boob" is the perfect word. The B looks like an aerial view of them, the 2 o's look like a front view, and the b looks like a side view.
F*ck valentines day
Those we love don't go away,
They walk beside us every day,
Unseen, unheard, but always near,
Still loved, still missed.
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