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Before I die, I wanna have a party with fake alcohol.. and see how many people act wasted.
Blonde: Will my laptop get heavier when I put more files in it? Brunette: ...
be careful who you open up to. only a few people actually care, the rest are just curious.
Awkward moment when your standing there pushing a pull door :/
That awkward moment when you sleep at your friends house and wake up before them, and all u can do is stare round their room for an hour or 2 til they wake up ........
Hey Google, why don't you sit next to me during my exam? ;)
ex-boyfriend and ex-girlfriend run into each other
boy:hey! listen, i really miss you
girl:*sneezes*
boy:bless you , are you sick?
girl:no, i'm just allergic to bulllSh*t.
Smile baby, it isn't hard. Go ahead, light up my world with your joy. It's a simple gesture, so just do it. Smile for me babe. It isn't hard. ♥
Girl: What's the price of this shirt?
Boy: 5 kisses
Girl: What's the price of that dress?
Boy: 10 kisses
Girl: pack both of them dad will pay
Boy: ...F*CK
oh, so this is act like me day today? you were acting like someone else before. immature retards.
Dude, Calm down. It's only P.E, not the Olympics.
if your still standing, you haven't drunk enough.
Boy: can i touch your software?
Girl: show me first your hardware
Boy: can i install it in your system?
Girl: OK! if you cover it with anti-virus first!
iloveyou.
if a boy likes a girl he should not stop fighting for her
ben and jerrys phish food!
Opinions are like kittens im just giving em away..
like if YOU LOST THE GAME
When you try and slide around in your socks like a ninja, but your socks aren't slippery enough
Like this if you want your peanut back!
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A guy broke into my apartment last week.. He didn't take the TV, just the remote. Now he drives by and changes the channels.. Sick Ba***rd..
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Hi im Dwayne, I like little boys.
Teen boy's mum and dad don't know that he swears on FB...
Dad: Im so in the loop now with all the cool kid's sayings.
Teen boy: *snorts* u sure bout that?
Dad: yup :)
Teen boy: ok then wat does LOL mean?
Dad: Laugh Out Loud
Teen: Wat does BRB mean?
Dad: Be right bak
Teen: wat does OMG mean?
Dad: Oh My God
Teen: wat does WTF mean? (oh, wait. crap.)
Dad: Why the face
Teen: ...
Dad: wat did i get one wrong? (i dont see how...)
Teen: NO!! u got them ALL RIGHT!! (just dont look them up!
If Someone Hurts You, Betrays You, Or Breaks Your Heart Forgive Them For They Have Helped You Learn Trust And The Importance Of Being Catious To Who It Is You Open Your Heart To.
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Nothing in life is unfixable...everything can be fixed when you put your mind to it!
I don't know what we're.Sometimes I feel like we're friends,sometimes I feel like we're more then friends,but sometimes I feel like I'm just a stranger to you.
"When I was 5 years old, my mother always told me that happiness was the key to life. When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down "happy". They told me I didn’t understand the assignment.
I told them they didn’t understand life."
— John Lennon
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