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Go to google translate, type in "MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW" and translate it to Chinese. Once you recover from laughing your butt off, like this :)
My girlfriend phoned me and said "Hey, wanna come over cuz no one is home. :D" So I went over and rang the door bell. She answered, so I broke up with her for lying to me. Like if you get it.
You're the first thing on my mind when I wake up in the morning, you're the last thing on my mind before I go to sleep, and you're every thought I have every second in betweeen. <3 (:
Missing someone isn't about how long it has been since you have seen them or the amount of time since you've talked. It's about that very moment when you're doing something and you wish that they were right there with you.
Dear sister I miss you only when I can't find some one to do my work for me
Sometimes I look at my best friend and think to myself 'Why the hell am i friends with this complete retard?'
I like turtles because they're so chill. They don't hurt anyone. They're just like, "Hey man, I want to swim, and maybe eat some lettuce. But I'm gonna take my time getting there, I'm not in a rush. Because I'm a turtle."
I may not be the most handsome guy or the 'fittest' dude, nor do I have a perfect body. I might not be everyone's first choice, but I’m a great choice. I do not pretend to be someone I’m not, because I’m good at being me. I might not be proud of some of the things in my past, but I’m proud of who I am today. So take me as I am, or watch me as I walk away! <3
be careful who you open up to. only a few people actually care, the rest are just curious.
I hate it how you cant get over your first love...
a black man walks to a bar. a white man says: "colored people are not allowed in here." the black man says: "when i'm born i'm black; when i'm cold i'm black; when i'm sick i'm black and when i'm dead i'm black! but when you're born you're pink; when you're cold you're blue; when you're sick you're green and when you're dead you're purple! yet you have the nerve to call me colored?!"
like it, if you are AGAINST RACISM
That crazy 5 seconds you have when you stand up to fast and go blind or extremely dizzy.
We fight like a married couple, We talk like best friends, We flirt like first loves, and protect each other like brother and sister, obviously its meant to be. <3
kesha, call naynay and laquanda, tell em to bring da straight razors n da vaseline, THESE B*tchES, ON SUM UTHA Sh*t.
Oh your dating my ex? Cool. Im eating a sandwhich.... You want those leftovers too?
Blonde: Will my laptop get heavier when I put more files in it?
Buddy: You're not Santa!
Fake Santa: Yes I am.
Buddy: No you're not.
Santa: Yes, I am.
Buddy: OK if you're Santa, what song did I sing to you on your birthday?
Santa: Why, uh, Happy Birthday, of course!
Buddy: Dang it...
I LOVE MY MOM. SHE'S ONE IN A MILLION.
"If you love two people at the same time, choose the second one, because if you really loved the first one you wouldn’t have fallen for the second" - Johnny Depp
Your Dad is the only man you will ever need, the only man who will never let you down, the only man that will always love you no matter what. I Love You Dad <3 <3
Snow White lived alone with seven men. Jasmine was in a forbidden relationship with Aladdin. Little Red Riding Hood didn't listen to her mother and went out. Pinocchio was a liar. Robin Hood was a thief. Tarzan walked without clothes on. Sleeping Beauty was kissed by a stranger and married him. Cinderella lied and sneaked out at night to attend a party.
These are the stories our parents raised us with & then they complain our generation is messed up?
Comments on your FB profile pic
friends: aww, you look so pretty! :)
best friends: Man, you lookin so s*xii! I would so tap that! XD
Did you know when someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles to frown but only 4 to extend your arm and punch them in the face.
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If I had a penny for every time I thought of you, I'd have one penny, because I never stop thinking of you.
**Boy & Girl on Facebook chat**
Boy: So what are u doin?
Girl: A lot of things
BOY: A, B, C
BOY: Always Be Careful
GIRL: ahh and then?
BOY: D, E, F, G
BOY: Don't Ever Forget That
GIRL: ForGet That
BOY: I'm H, I
BOY: Happilly Inlove
BOY: J, K, L, M, Just Keep Loving Me
GIRL: and how about N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, Z ?
BOY: No Other Person Quite, Reasonable, Shall Treat U Very Well Xcept me You'll
cheers for nipples.cause without them boobs would be pointless
playing hangman and using dirty words :)
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That moment you catch yourself smiling for no reason as you look at him, feeling so happy and at peace, and then he turns to you and smiles back. That shared glance that no one else can ever touch, no one could ever break. love...
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